I'm feeling better than I have in a while. I think the rainy weather over the weekend didn't help my mood, although generally I love the rain, and being hormonal and PMS-y didn't help either. I feel like such a pussy when I complain about the weather in California; I mean, I used to deal with snow and sleet and sub-zero temperatures, a little rain (or even a lot) is really nothing to moan about. But then, I've acclimated, and now I whine when it's not clear skies and 70 degrees. And knowing that I'm hormonal and that my mood is being effected by my biology doesn't seem to help either. I still feel down and bitchy, like nothing will ever be right again. And then there's that comforting red gush (still not pregnant! Yay!), and it's sunny and clear today, and I feel better.
Not that everything's perfect. My dearest husband is experiencing a considerable amount of pain as the daily injections make his bones ache. He says it feels like the medicine seeks out the weak spots in his body (past injuries, damaged joints), and makes them hurt, probably part of the healing process. I can only hope that the symptoms get better over time, since he's got quite a while to go. His mood is good, and that helps my mood too. We kind of feed off each other's energy that way. Creepy? maybe, but after seventeen years(!!), a certain symbiosis/codependence is understandable.
Work is still sucky, but manageable, and as long as I keep to the promise I made myself, I feel okay about things. Days like today remind me that there are still possibilities, still hope, that I can make things better despite the obstacles that (often lately) seem insurmountable.